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Friday, March 22, 2013

Being yourself: Active Speaking

Photo Credits: Douglas Heriot

I want to be more of myself and 

who I really am.

I'm an introverted person and curious about other people. Everyone is so different and it can be fun learning more about those differences. As a  result I like listening to others more than talking about myself but who I am doesn't get across.

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Can you hear their battle ? 

Think of people as songs, are they happy, sad, or anxious? To me everyone is on their own journey and if you listen carefully you can hear it. Relationships are all about communication and understanding one another.

Active listening is the foundation to my strongest/closest relationship.

Rather than listening passively. Listen with your eyes and mind. Pay attention to their verbal and body language and all of a sudden you will hear what you didn't hear before. Allows you to better connect and tune in, you can put into words what they feel but can't. Accomplishing that will allow them to feel you truly understand them. 

The last few years active listening is what I've focused on improving, learning to hear what their song and story is. With that I then know how to change the way I communicate to match and harmonize with them. 

Playing your own song

Not everyone will listen to learn what your song is though. I've found that people rarely will give you back the same time you spend listening to what they have to say.  I've gone through hours of listening to someone talk about themselves without being asked how I am doing. Frustrating and tiring at times because you need to match them and not your own

What about the reverse though ? Active Speaking. Creating that same connection that you can through active listening but through speaking about yourself instead. Learning to express yourself in such a way that others tune into your own song instead of the reverse. To communicate in such a way that people want to connect into your own world. How am I going to try and do that ? 

By being more of myself


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